My journey exploring my Afro-Latina roots and identity has been interesting. It has had twists and turns, but it has led to a happy ending. My mother is an indigenous Puerto Rican, and my father is Black from Saint Lucia. Their identities have contributed to the unique blend of cultures that I hold so near and dear to my heart.
Every Saturday morning, the air was filled with both salsa and soca when my mother made breakfast. Sometimes my feelings can only be expressed in either Spanish or Patois. I bought 2 sets of small boxing gloves and tied them together so I could have both represented on my rearview mirror.
Being both Black and Hispanic, there were many times when I felt like a ghost in different spaces. My presence was felt, but it was undermined. I spent most of my childhood, adolescence, and early college years feeling like I was neither Black enough nor Hispanic enough. Yet, I was never treated like I was one more than the other.
Whether in college, the workforce, or even within my extended family, I never felt I deserved the identities I was taught to be proud of. It wasn't until my sophomore year of college, when I decided to serve on the executive board of the Afro-Latine Student Association at my PWI, that I realized I wasn't on one journey, but on multiple.
I was in a unique spot, having to navigate both my Blackness and my Latinidad at the same time. Since then, I have developed a new passion for my heritage and identity as they apply to my race and ethnicity while continuing to educate myself on their meanings and implications. Everyone’s journey towards racial/ethnic affirmation is different, so here are some things I did and still do to find joy in being an Afro-Latina!
Learning the Difference Between Race and Ethnicity
Race and ethnicity are both social constructs meant to group people into categories, and they are often used interchangeably. While the concept of race groups people based on perceived shared physical features in order to establish and maintain social stratification, ethnicity is based on grouping people by a shared culture.
For example, Latine regions are united by similar languages, histories, and familial values. Differentiating between the two was the critical first step in my racial/ethnic affirmation. Once I understood that Black is a race and Hispanic/Latine is an ethnicity, that was literal proof that I can be both. Something I always remember, and that I will continue to reference throughout this piece, is that not everyone has the same experience with their Blackness or their Latinidad. Whether you grew up primarily experiencing one culture or multiple, it does not take away from who you are as Black and/or Latine.
History is Everything!
People always tell you it is important to remember your roots for a reason. History plays a crucial role in your understanding and connection with your racial/ethnic culture. During my time in the Afro-Latine Student Association, I discovered that where there are Black people, there is Black history. Not only is there Black history in Latin America, but it has also so many parallels to what we have learned in the United States. Researching where my parents are from changed my perspective on, and connection to, my family and ancestors.
As I got older, I began to understand my parents better because I knew where their roots were planted and how deep they ran, which helped me build a stronger relationship with them. I can always look back to my ancestors and the generations that came before me who fought for me to have a place in this world. My passion, ambition, and dedication are rooted in my heritage, which I have leaned on during times of adversity, stagnancy, and aimlessness.
Exploring Culture and What it Means to You
The theme of my journey toward accepting and embracing both my Blackness and Latinidad was throwing things at the wall and hoping they stuck. Exploring what your culture(s) mean to you involves finding what you connect with most in your culture. Ethnoculture includes many things: language, food, music, values, and storytelling. This means there are so many ways to find excitement in your culture! Some of my most meaningful memories with my culture(s) were helping my mom cook her cultural foods and giving me instructions in Spanish. Moments like these laid the foundation for a strong relationship with my culture and with my mom.
Although my parents did a great job socializing me, the messages I received everywhere else still made me doubt having pride in my heritage. So, I still had to make a concerted effort to find meaning in it. I told my mom to only speak to me in Spanish so I could become more fluent. I asked my dad what his favorite artists were when he was growing up. I begged my mom to take salsa classes with me and my dad to show me how to make his favorite food.
For me, what connects me most to my cultures is the resilience passed down through generations. It flows through my veins and keeps me going when times are hard. These may seem like little things, but the additions they make towards racial/ethnic affirmation are worthwhile. What connects us to our culture can make us feel proud, rooted, and liberated.
Not Letting People Revoke My Cards
Blackness and Latinidad show themselves in different ways, and losing sight of that can divide us more than we think. Growing up Black and Hispanic in a Caribbean family is different from doing the same in an American family. To demonstrate this, I will confess a few things. I don't like collard greens, I love heavy metal, and the first time I ever had savory grits was in my junior year of college, when I was the only one in the room who didn't know the words to “Can We Talk?” by Tevin Campbell. In the same vein, many have tried to deny me my Blackness when they discovered I was also Latina, and vice versa.
When certain characteristics and interests are associated with Blackness and Latinidad, we unfortunately give people the opportunity to withhold these cultures. The idea of revoking someone’s Black/Hispanic card means that someone has the power to decide whether your experiences with Blackness or Latinidad are valid. Neither can be confined in this manner because every experience within a specific race and/or ethnicity is valid. When I stopped entertaining the idea of “revoking these cards,” I felt like my racial/ethnic identity was something that no one could take away from me.
The Connection to My Future Career in Psychology
My racial and ethnic identity as an Afro-Latina has become a significant part of being an early career professional. It has guided my research, as my interests lie in racial/ethnic stressors and how they connect to certain mental health outcomes and physical health behaviors. For my approach to clinical practice, I work towards a multicultural perspective by practicing cultural humility rather than achieving cultural competence. Because I know that not all Black and/or Latine folks are a monolith, I strive to approach clients with a constant curiosity rather than with judgment.
Having a strong sense of racial/ethnic identity can serve as a protective factor for facing adversity and is linked to better mental health outcomes. I have witnessed these outcomes personally within my journey towards racial/ethnic affirmation and my experiences with my personal therapist, so I know how meaningful it can be to have a mental health provider that is proud of their identity. My journey toward racial/ethnic affirmation is ongoing, but I hope to support others on theirs as well!
Photos by Asap PANG and Felix Mittermeier on Unsplash
